


Bakesale

by gabewrites



Category: Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator
Genre: Ill be posting more joseph backstory hopefully soon, Im sorry for writing more of this grossness, M/M, Sick Character, Sickfic, This is gross dont read it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-27
Updated: 2017-11-27
Packaged: 2019-02-07 14:02:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12842706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gabewrites/pseuds/gabewrites
Summary: Robert isn't sick because Robert Small doesn't get sick and if he does, he doesn't let Joseph Christiansen take care of him.





	Bakesale

**Author's Note:**

> (IM SORRY PLEASE DON'T LOOK AT ME) Joseph backstory chapter 3 is coming along, I just posted this on Tumblr a while ago and realized I never put it here.
> 
> I love everyone who reads my gross shit, and I apologize in advance that you read my gross shit.

Today was a bake sale day, one of Joseph’s favorite days. That was apparent by the enthusiastic way he pulled brownies out of the oven and bagged different kinds of cookies to sell. He buzzed around the room trying to get himself organized, and Robert walked in to smell the sickening sweet scent of brownie batter filling his kitchen. “Do you have to make my house smell like a bakery every month, Christiansen?” Robert yawned and stretched as he made his way over to the fridge, his voice a little gravely after he had woken up. 

Joseph jumped when Robert’s voice startled him out of his concentration, his face flushing after he realized who was greeting him. “If I want to make any good money for church renovations and fix-ups, then yes, I do.” He began laying bags of baked goods in a bigger container to carry out to the truck, a smile on his face while he did so. “Everyone in this town loves a good bake sale, religious or not.” Joseph popped a small brownie in his mouth and lifted up his giant container of sweets. 

Robert pulled a bottle of water out of the fridge and took a few sips, cringing at the rough way it went down his throat. He must have been really thirsty. He decided bringing the water with him was probably a wise decision, and he made his way over to Joseph with tired eyes before planting a nice gentle kiss on his lips. “Well, you’ve got me there-“ Robert licked his own lips with a low laugh after pulling away. “And your brownies are delicious.”

“So you’ll help me carry things out to the car?” Joseph gave  
his most convincing puppy dog eyes and glanced over at the folding table  
leaning against the counter.

Robert rolled his eyes and hoisted the table up with a groan, following Joseph outside. “It’s a truck, gorgeous, don’t call my baby a car.” Joseph let out one of those heartfelt, dreamy sighs that he always made when Robert pulled out a pet name. Robert slid the table into the back of his truck and covered his mouth when he coughed, a weak pain in his chest.

Joseph gave him a firm pat on the back and placed the baked goods in the back next to the table. “Are you alright?” Joseph seemed worried, and his hand stayed in its place to rub Robert’s back gently. Robert pulled the keys to his truck out of his pocket, leaning back against Joseph’s hand for a moment before sighing and making his way to the driver’s seat.

A frown was still on Joseph’s face when he slid into the passenger’s side. He was waiting for an answer. Robert started the car and cracked a fake smile that Joseph scoffed at. “Alright, alright, I’m just tired and I have a sore throat, it’s too early for this shit.” Joseph handed the bottle of water from earlier over to Robert and Robert wondered how Joseph managed to pull useful things out of his ass. “Thanks, Jo.” The water still felt gritty and unsatisfying as it went down his throat. 

The truck pulled away loudly and Joseph nibbled on a fresh chocolate chip cookie with only feelings of pure joy swimming through his head. Sometimes Robert wanted to slap the happiness out of him. No one should be that happy in the morning. Especially not an early Saturday morning. “Don’t miss the turn.” Robert shook his head and saw the turn they were headed for- how did he almost miss it? “Are you alright, Rob?” Joseph frowned as they made the turn, coming to a halt in the church parking lot.

“Yeah, fine, tired, I’ll uh-“ Robert leaned down to sneeze into the crook of his elbow, a snotty sniffle echoing through the space. “I’ll wake up.” Before Joseph could protest, Robert was out of the truck and heading to the back to grab the table and head over to set up. He wasn’t about to let a little sniffle keep  him from helping out. This was important to Joseph, so he was doing it. God, he was so wrapped around that man’s finger sometimes. 

He could tell that Joseph was giving him a protective stare of suspicion, but he tried to ignore it as he unfolded the table and started to set up. Once he had finished he stepped back to admire his handy work, grinning until his nose started to tickle again. Instead of letting himself sneeze, he put pressure under his nose and waited for the feeling to go away. Not sick. He wasn’t sick. 

-xxxxx-

“Robert?” Joseph spoke softly and Robert opened his eyes, looking up from his chair. He had almost started dozing off, but he jolted upright at the gentle tone of voice being used on him. He tried to clear his throat and felt a little worse. Shit. 

Robert held back another sneeze and stared Joseph right in the eye with a smile. “Yeah? Are we getting any paying customers soon?” Robert can feel his throat rattling, like gravel has run through it. He watches Joseph zone out at the sounds of his voice and notes the light pink tint that the youth minister is trying to fend off. A loud, obnoxious sniffle snaps him out of it.

Damn Robert and that sexy, gravelly voice. That distracting, sexy, gravelly voice. It was downright unfair, but Joseph grinned and pointed at an approaching potential buyer. “Yes, in fact, I think things are about to pick up.” It was easy for Joseph to shift into his overly excited mood that he always got when waiting for the rush to start. He really did love the bake sales, and everyone who came to them. He waved politely and grinned when Craig approached them.

“Is today looking like a cheat day?” Craig sighed longingly and surveyed the table of sweets. It was even more extensive than last time. He knew he shouldn’t be craving one of those cookies, but he sure was. Joseph’s encouraging smile didn’t help the internal struggle with his own health.

The twins popped up behind their dad, mouth’s watering at the selection of sugar. Their eyes drifted to the left side of the table. “I’m not here for me, bro, I’m here for the twins.” Briar and Hazel looked up at their dad and then back to the table. “They want more of those brownies from the last one- they were begging to come to the bake sale, bro.” Joseph was glowing, even though he knew damn well that those brownies and this week’s brownies came from a box.

Robert felt the pressure in his nose growing uncomfortable, almost painful, like that sort of awful tingly feeling when you wake up in the morning and haven’t blown a stuffy nose in hours. Uncomfortable, tickling his sinuses and- “Josepfhh!” He was cut off by his own sneeze, interrupting the conversation with something that sounded like ‘HHhhSCFUHh’ and holding his hands in front of his face with fear on his face. He has tried to warn Joseph, but it was a little too late. Joseph dug through a box and pulled out a tiny pack of travel tissues before handing one to Robert.

Robert’s face was flushed red, a small amount from the sneeze and the rest because of the fact that he had just snotted all over his hands in front of Craig and his kids. Craig just laughed shrugging and taking a sip of one of those protein shakes he carried around. “You doing alright there, bro? You don’t sound very healthy.” Robert almost groaned at the lecture he was about to get, how he should start working out and drinking that green stuff. “You know-“

Joseph cut Craig off with a bag of two brownies and a smile, wincing as Robert continued.

‘hh-h-hHUSZchHUU’ 

Craig looked concerned now, taking the bag and handing Joseph a dollar-fifty. “I hope you get better, sucks being sick, man.” The twins snatched the bag up and quickly retrieved the two brownies, huge bites in their mouths and grins on their faces as they ran to a shady spot under a tree. 

“I’mbnotsfick.” Robert nearly growled it out, but it was much less intimidating when his sinuses were clogged. He crossed his arms and ignored the warmth in his cheeks. 

Joseph grinned and kissed his nose.

-xxxxx-

“fPSCZHUUU”

Robert was struggling with the pack of tissues in his hand and trying to wipe snot off of his face and hands. Another wet sneeze rang through the air. “You’re not sick, gorgeous?” Joseph rested the back of his hand on Robert’s forehead and smiled. “You’re very warm, sweetheart.” Joseph stole a kiss and handed Robert some extra tissues when he started working up to another sneeze. 

“HH- h- shut up, asshole- hH-HHhSCZHHh” 

“Language!” Joseph shushed him and handed off a bag of cookies to a mom and her child. “We’re almost done.” Robert surveyed the slowly dwindling inventory, glad that things were going well but more than ready to get home. He couldn’t help feeling embarrassed when every sneeze had all eyes in his direction. “Embarrassed?” Joseph ran a hand through Robert’s hair, watching as everyone around them started to clean off their tables. Robert was looking anywhere but at Joseph. “It’s adorable.”

Robert blew his nose with a loud honking noise and sighed. “Stop it-“ Robert was cut off again by his own wet sneeze, his nose irritated and red from the number of tissues he had used in the past hour. “Why do you think-“ A helpless noise hit the air as Robert tried not to sneeze again. “Why is this adorable?” Joseph just grinned and tapped Robert’s nose gently, laughing softly as the man went into a sneezing fit. By the time he was done, Joseph had already packed all of the sweets still left into a small box, and Robert was glaring at him.

“You have the red nose, and the sleepy hair-“ Joseph started folding the table, glancing over at the grumpy, but still adorable man sitting and waiting for them to leave. “And you do make some helpless noises while trying to keep yourself together.” Robert rolled his eyes and stood up, having to take a moment to gain his balance so that he didn’t fall over. He was pretty out of it after so much sitting and nearly drifting to sleep. Tired Robert was also undeniably cute. “I wish you could see yourself right now.”

Robert sunk into his jacket and folded the chair he had been sitting in, watching Joseph carry the table and the box cheerfully to the truck. That man just did not have an off switch. 

-xxxxx-

As expected, despite Robert’s resilient cold, Joseph was eyeing him the whole way home, a smug look on his face. He was acting innocent, but Robert knew those sideways glances that he gave when he was trying to be subtle. It was not subtle. But Robert let Joseph pretend that all that lip biting and seat shifting was the most subtle thing that he had ever seen. And as soon as they pulled back into the driveway Joseph gave Robert that _look._

“You’re doing it.” Robert sighed, but there was a laugh in it this time, followed by a cough. 

Joseph looked down at his lap as he opened the door, but he was smiling. “What are you talking about?” The speed in which they exited the car meant that they both knew what he was talking about. Everyone in the cul-de-sac probably got sick of watching them have this exchange. 

The door was barely closed before Joseph was pulling Robert into a kiss by his jacket, letting Robert pull away to sneeze again at the change in temperature, his sinuses tingling. “You’re gonna get sick, Jo.” Robert backed Joseph against the wall, hands gripping Joseph’s waist firmly. He was serious, but he wasn’t about to stop Joseph from working his magic, even when he was trying to stop snot from dripping. 

Joseph’s hands moved to Robert’s face. “The more the merrier?” Robert shucked off his jacket and sniffled as he wiped his nose, loving that he could feel the warmth radiating from his face and onto Joseph. 

Robert shrugged and leaned back in to meet Joseph’s lips, sniffling as he worked a button open on Joseph’s polo. Joseph shivered as a cold hand slid under his shirt. “Whatever gets you going, kid.”


End file.
